you drown yourself into your dreams
even you know it won't save you from realms
more and more shadows you will start to see
less you care about the conditions you feel
sleeping, it's your deepest reality
killing, another insanity
falling, another step away from humanity
drowning dreams, they are more than infinity
you think you can walk down to ur fantasy?
and take the legacy!?
No! because you need to read the policy
before killing the entity
in you, what you need to get rid of really!
there are no lines or barriers
you are just one of those carriers
whose burden is easily sinking
into the rivers where poor ones are drinking
sleeping, it's your deepest reality
killing, another insanity
falling, another step away from humanity
drowning dreams, they are more than infinity
you think you can walk down to ur fantasy?
and take the legacy!?
No! because you need to read the policy
before killing the entity
in you, what you need to get rid of really!
counting realms, in ur dreams
have become an addiction
hollow places in you paralized mind
eating ur affiction
dream on, this is the only way
out of this raging hell
or you will be similiar to those who fell
sleeping, it's your deepest reality
killing, another insanity
falling, another step away from humanity
drowning dreams, they are more than infinity
you think you can walk down to ur fantasy?
and take the legacy!?
No! because you need to read the policy
before killing the entity
in you, what you need to get rid of really!
Blogi.
Those lies, those hopeless tries
when i try to talk to you
you're ignoring, you're ripping me apart
and then you turn your back on me while hazart
thinking all the time you're smart ?
i cannot ignore you anymore
Why do u always try to take me down with you ?
How can't you just śee the real me ?
Is there anywhere any hope ?!
I just need you to see
whó i really want to be
you see ? i'm fallin' down
be happy, you can wear the crown
after i will push you back down
and laugh while you drown
this is hard for me, will be harder for you
you destroy every hope i can ever make true
everything is now freaking blue
please give me a clue
then i can speak to you while we bloom
I'm lost, everything on the path has turned to dust
everything good is now bloodlust
you clear everything inside me, you must
to break me and then enjoy your big blast
why do u always ignore everything i try to proove?
why do u always push me out of your way of zoom ?
Why do u always try to take me down with you ?
How can't you just śee the real me ?
Is there anywhere any hope ?!
I just need you to see
whó i really want to be
you see ? i'm fallin' down
be happy, you can wear the crown
after i will push you back down
and laugh while you drown
this is hard for me, will be harder for you
you destroy every hope i can ever make true
everything is now freaking blue
please give me a clue
then i can speak to you while we bloom
Is there every any hope ?
Please give me, if you got
Otherwise i fall, never rise up
with you or without
i will always be apart
thanks to you, who just tried being smart
at the isle of the strongest love
flowers bloom
before the day of doom
others will arrive
and do everything to survive
they'll come on the darkest day
when everyone start to pray
They know that this day
can easily be their doomsday
searching hope
devil might they find
they don't leave even if they see the sign
of the darkest devil
who seeks and destroys everything
on their minds are thoughts of golden rings
keeping every coin
thinking if they save
they will live in vain
Legend says that before the rain
strangers fall down and feel the pain
they know that easily it can be their doomsday
but their minds are still full of pride and credit
should be many things what need them to edit
They know that this day
can easily be their doomsday
searching hope
devil might they find
they don't leave even if they see the sign
of the darkest devil
who seeks and destroys everything
on their minds are thoughts of golden rings
keeping every coin
thinking if they save
they will live in vain
Wierd things chasing after them
they took someone's gem
what lied upon a curse
what is coming is way worse
they die, and there's nothing what they can do
decide
between suicide
or pride and credit ?
on a meaningless world ...
They know that this day
can easily be their doomsday
searching hope
devil might they find
they don't leave even if they see the sign
of the darkest devil
who seeks and destroys everything
on their minds are thoughts of golden rings
keeping every coin
thinking if they save
they will live in vain
your soul has died
after that you were all alone
not better than a standing stone
you just wanted to be whole
once again, like you were with him
now everything has become a sin
you were different with him
you loved him
he was always there for you
you loved him
you were made for each other
but sadly he fell
it's such a shame
i know u wish to peak on the other side
he was perfect
maiby it's much better after the tide
behind the slide
he is always taking care of you
and u know it
You want to hear his voice again
otherwise pain and damage is only you gain
look back and see what you obtain
through the doors and rain
he will be there to prove the vain
you were different with him
you loved him
he was always there for you
you loved him
you were made for each other
but sadly he fell
it's such a shame
i know u wish to peak on the other side
he was perfect
maiby it's much better after the tide
behind the slide
he is always taking care of you
and u know it
You still cant find a way out of this hell
but he strongly advises you not to fall
you wish you could see to the other side
otherwise u'll be ever last burning on the inside
you were different with him
you loved him
he was always there for you
you loved him
you were made for each other
but sadly he fell
it's such a shame
i know u wish to peak on the other side
he was perfect
maiby it's much better after the tide
behind the slide
he is always taking care of you
and u know it
We met us on the darksome hallway
sameful thoughts
we take all we gain
these are the roots
where we forever want to stay
Darksome days with hollow rains
it helps get us over the day
otherwise the old days will never cease
and everyone around us will leave
Darksome Hallway
The place that gods have chosen us to stay
Darksome Hallway
The place where wishes come true
Darksome Hallway
We never will forget
Every second here makes me love you more and more
We were young and stupid
Journey was long and hard
finally we found it
where we love to be
even despite the stories we hear
They say this place is full of dark
They're wrong, because this is like an amusement park
Darksome days with hollow rains
it helps get us over the day
otherwise the old days will never cease
and everyone around us will leave
Darksome Hallway
The place that gods have chosen us to stay
Darksome Hallway
The place where wishes come true
Darksome Hallway
We never will forget
Every second here makes me love you more and more
this place full of life
loves us as we love it tight
values are here set up right
but all that counts is it's might
It saves us from the tears
from the rumours, stories, thoughts we don't wanna hear
even this place is called dark
we love it hard
Darksome days with hollow rains
it helps get us over the day
otherwise the old days will never cease
and everyone around us will leave
Darksome Hallway
The place that gods have chosen us to stay
Darksome Hallway
The place where wishes come true
Darksome Hallway
We never will forget
Every second here makes me love you more and more
I keep running away
until the day
when someone takes all evil away
I fall and i crash
because killing you is the only way
to get over this pain
This is who i'm when
i pretend i dont feel any pain
you are the living rain
what kills everything
IN ME!
I run, i hide, i'm scared, this is not who i wanted to be, you can't see the real me, as long as i wait less i care because u know i fear when it comes up to you please, help me . I don't want to care anymore.
I start walking back slowly
it's better this way
when i'm whole
time after time
you are letting me down
it is impossible to get out
I run, i hide, i'm scared,i listen to you, this is not who i wanted to be, you can't see the real me, as long as i wait less i care because u know i fear when it comes up to you please, help me .
I JUST DON'T WANT TO CARE ANYMORE
I HATE BELIEVING IN YOU
YOU ALWAYS TAKE ME DOWN
YOU RIP ME APART
YOU THINK YOU'RE FREAKING SMART
YOU'RE KILLING THE ONLY ME
WHO IS ALWAYS THERE FOR YOU
WHAT THE FUCK DO U WANT ME TO BE
WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?
I left you
You tore me back
I couldn't leave
why ...
I run, i hide, i'm scared
This is not who i wanted to be
you can't see the real me
As long as i wait
less i care
because u know i fear
when it comes up to you
I JUST DON'T WANT TO CARE ANYMORE
I HATE BELIEVING IN YOU
YOU ALWAYS TAKE ME DOWN
YOU RIP ME APART
YOU THINK YOU'RE FREAKING SMART
YOU'RE KILLING THE ONLY ME
WHO IS ALWAYS THERE FOR YOU
WHAT THE FUCK DO U WANT ME TO BE
WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?
You make me care
You make me believe
you let me down
you won't let go
you keep strangling me
you keep ripping me
you keep twisting me
you keep using me
i keep hating you
i keep lieing to you
i keep listening to your voice
i try to ignore you
but i cannot run away
because i fucking love you
Okay, i had a perfect dream today.
Me and my relative Sander were sent somehow back to year 2007 :x(noideahow, we were just there)
It was like a movie when you can change your life . Chance is too good.
Okay. Sander went his own way. I figured out that i should go home and start making changes directly there. I had no power in home back then to do something critical . But i remember that i told my granny to buy a new something for me. I don't remember what it is anymore.
It was like a timeline ...
Next day was school. I was totally stunned how my classmates looked like, it was exactly like 2 years ago. Anti was still speaking too much in class. Merli laughed so mutch with Eneli infront of the classroom. Somehow the school ended so quickly, it was like 1 hour only lol.
I saw Merli outside, we weren't so good friends back then but i thought that oh, everything is still the same so i'll go and speak to her.
I went beside her, started chatting like: Hey, you don't give me a hug :x ?
she was like: What !?
Then i started explaining to her about the timetravel. She told me that i should go to see a doctor x'D. She didn't believe nothing what i said to her. So i told her, i can proove it to you, just come with you, i'll show you the place where i got here(was a dark spot lol) .. Then Sander came back .. and i woke up. I DIDN'T WANT TO WOKE UP. I wanted to stay in that dream for whole eternity. It was so cool, i had actually a chance to change things.
And i remember one spot more: In german lesson with Anti and Merli. Ken was away somewhere lol ..
Anti started making fun of me. Then Merli started shouting on her: Mind ur own business.
God why .... I wanted to stay IN .
It was the best dream, over a long, long, long fucking eternity .
i' m running, ur ignoring
i' m waiting, ur taking
everything I obtain
you slam me like a pearl
I try to hold on ..
even if i run, i' m still being held
I want to escape, witch i never do
I cannot take this anymore...
just come after me
push me back into the whole
you'll surprise because i can hold on
holding on makes me stronger
even tho i' m younger
raping, killing, hurting me doesn' t help you anymore
i will do everything the same the with you
i will hunt you, burn, drown, kill you
I'm healing, you're reducing
I'm killing, you're dieing
I'm trying to take u down
but after you always catch me
even if i run, i' m still being held
I want to escape, witch i never do
I cannot take this anymore...
just come after me
push me back into the whole
you'll surprise because i can hold on
holding on makes me stronger
even tho i' m younger
raping, killing, hurting me doesn' t help you anymore
i will do everything the same the with you
i will hunt you, burn, drown, kill you
Is this all worth it ?
can't you stop lieing
can't you leave me be ?
why are you doing this to me ?
I'm getting away ...
Why now!?
I will fucking leave u alive
Why now!?
I'm taking all i can now
Why now !?
you tore us all apart ...
just come after me
push me back into the whole
you'll surprise because i can hold on
holding on makes me stronger
even tho i' m younger
raping, killing, hurting me doesn' t help you anymore
i will do everything the same the with you
i will hunt you, burn, drown, kill you
Do not copy any of these lyrics, don't use them on ur own profit .
-you killed
You always push me
over the edge
You always hurt me
until i'm dead inside
You ignore me
After all your problems
You're always the one who tares me apart
Into pieces
I just can't let go
after everything i have gone through
I never gonna be a man like you ...
I still try to hold on
and proove that i didn't do anything wrong
The longer you last
The less i want to live
until you blast
Into pieces
what you did to me
You always drown me
into my thoughts
You always change me
until you find another excuse
You twist me
After all your problems
You're always the one who tares me apart
Into pieces
I just can't let go
after everything i have gone through
I never gonna be a man like you ...
I still try to hold on
and proove that i didn't do anything wrong
The longer you last
The less i want to live
until you blast
Into pieces
what you did to me
Look, what you've done to me
(i scream)
Look, how i kill myself
(infront of you)
My pieces have rotted away
the flow drowns them
Just wait
after the day
you see me go whole once again
I just can't let go
after everything i have gone through
I never gonna be a man like you ...
I still try to hold on
and proove that i didn't do anything wrong
The longer you last
The less i want to live
until you blast
Into pieces
what you did to me
Real life plays a important roll in this.
Listening to: Three Days Grace - Animal I Have Become/Pain
Mkay . I was left all alone, so i thought i'll blog again . Since i have really nothing better to do . Watching a movie all alone is frustrating ):
Mkay. Right after my post, if i'm right ... Erki and Ruth arrived. So everyone like gathered into one room, i've no idea witch room it was i think it was the bed-room. So we kinda settled in there. Merli even took herself a blanket :D Okay after an half hour we sent Erki home. You know bodyguard is needed when u walk sutch an long road. So we headed back, got few calls also. Secret. I had a very nice chat with Merli, witch i really loved, oh god, if we could do this more often... would be awesome. So we almost finished the movie but .. failed. I think that i chose a bad movie this time. Name of the movie was ''Tropic Thunder'', a comedy . Just check it out from YT, i liked it.
Now they left somewhere. No idea where. I think it's their secret place of something, since i wasn't invited o.O
But it's not the end of the world either lol, i can live with that knowledge. Damn, i don't know what the hell is going on but inside me i feel kinda desolated.
Okay, something good now!
I just found out that chick from Canada is actually coming to visit us. Not me but my family relatives or something lol. She will stay here like for a month, whole august. I mean that's like mega cool. She has nothing to do there anyway so i think i will hang around with her. So she wouln't be so bored. + Merli invited me to that rut's festival or whatever it name was. I asked Hellery(chick from Canada) to join us and she gladly agreed.
oh, gosh, where did they go now .... i'm kinda like: Bored. Saaad .
Anywayz cheers.
Okay, i'm with Merli and Eneli. Just chatting nothing more is going on!
We watched a movie, what we didn't complete .
Just stayed unfinished.
Hey, I'm Merli. Matis just went to kitchen to look for my camera. He can't find it. Hah, lol. I don't even know where I put it. Anyways.. He told me to write in here. But I don't know, what to write. And it's really cool, that Matis came to visit us. Ruth will join us soon. Then it's like three girls and one boy. How cool is that? I personally have no idea what we are going to do in here. I have no idea what Matis and Eneli are doing in the kitchen I was just sent here to blog. Maybe I should talk about him as much as I know ? Ah, fck, I don't care, I'm going to write in anyway.
Well, I like saw Matis in the first grade. I still remember our first class picture. Laughing out loud. I was blonde then and he has changed pretty much too. I mean it has been 9 years. We didn't communicate like all those 8 years we studied in the same class, but in 9th grade we became friends. I love irony, that now, when we are like so good friends, I'm going to another school. But it's not the end. Matis' just such a good friend. He listens to me and I listen to him. It's like the best thing that he is honest with me. I don't have much that kind of friends, who can be honest until the end. I hope I am as good friend to him as he is to me. Do you know how friendly he is? He has bought me ice-cream, he always offers me chocolate and drink too. And his sense of humor, it's like sometimes so funny that only we can laugh. Or they're so sick jokes, that they doesn't make sense to anybody else. Do you think it's funny if I buy him ice-cream? I had to laugh my head off when he was standing behind me in the line and then I had to pay for him ice-cream. It was so funny to me. Still laughing. But he bought it back to me after we had English exam. And in every class we had in school he always made jokes. And yes, that's how special he is. Treasure him. Because I know that I'm doing it and I will always do it. And altough I'm going to another school and stuff, he'll still be my friend. I'm sure, because it's summer right now and we still communicate so the school is not the only place where we can meet.
I'm going to finish know ( for this time ). He just wants to read this text so much. I don't want to let him wate in the kitchen no more. I'll give him that joy to read my thoughts about him. Probably he deletes it all. Okay, I don't believe that. Anyway'z bye!
And thanks Matis for trusting me and all, you're a good friend :) .
Matis responses the following text:
I would be dead without Merli, the only one who ever cared about me, only one who ever did something for me, only one who tryed to help me the way out of this freaking hell. She has no idea i think atleast that i've wrote hundreds of song-lyrics about her . She's perfect . She's the form who is created to save me. Really, she's the only thing what still keeps me away from the other side. ''If I stay, it won't be long, Till I'm burning on the inside, If I go I can only hope, That I make it to the other side'' I'll Stay and she helps me. Thank you Merli . For Everything
These lyrics are here temporarily only. Don't copy this post in any way .
On the edge of the hardest rage
quick as rocks,heartstones, thoughts they fall
they run away from the edge
and there's none who could ever Save them
The ones, who try
Always end up lieing
They sink, deeply
Into their thoughts
The lucky ones who escape
leave no light
to guide others through this nightmare
..But there's still something inside me what tryes to define the way
Away from this edge
This edge is a dirty pool and we sink
as much as we try to think
out the way
away from the edge witch saves a hit
They always keep telling up values
Witch don't matter even abit to others
I keep lieing to myself ... COZ
The ones, who try
Always end up lieing
They sink, deeply
Into their thoughts
The lucky ones who escape
leave no light
to guide others through this nightmare
There's still something inside me what tryes to define the way
Away from this edge
On the edge of the hardest rage
quick as rocks,heartstones, thoughts they run
they run away from the edge
and there's none who could ever Save them
THEIR HARD STONED HEARTS
CANT EVEN SEE HOW I TRY
to lead them away from the edge ...
The ones, who try
Always end up lieing
They sink, deeply
Into their thoughts
The lucky ones who escape
leave no light
to guide others through this nightmare
There's still something inside me what tryes to define the way
Away from this edge
Listening to: Skillet - Rebirthing
Okay, i had no chance to nolife yesterday coz my relatives sister is sooooo evil. She could be abit mad too, afterall i slept in her bed :D (ofc alone).
Atm, i'm chatting is msn with Kittah about soft porn and manga anime :D Rosario+vampire, whoever is reading this thread should start watching it too. It's very funny actually, you can always see their underwear. It's like Drawn Together on VIVA.
But if ur very naughty then you should start watching HENTAI. If you don't have a clue what it means, then type it into google.
And Dollu, happy birthday!! Stay Dark.
cheers.